Keeping the Thanks in Thanksgiving

by Suzanne Wiley, volunteer contributor

Quite a few years ago, fresh out of college and in my first house without roommates, I decided to host Thanksgiving. Instead of a boozy Friendsgiving of holidays past, I was going to invite distant relatives who lived in the area. My plan was to serve all the traditional Thanksgiving fare—turkey, ham, mashed potatoes, green bean casserole, sweet potato casserole and pecan pie. Never in my life had I attempted such a spread. I knew I could make mac and cheese, heat spaghetti sauce and order a mean pizza, but roasting a turkey? I wasn’t so sure. In my mind, it couldn’t be that hard, could it? After all, I had watched various family members roast turkeys for 20-some years. It still made me nervous, so I was relieved when one relative—lets call her Kimnay*—offered to bring the turkey. I was delighted! That way I was going to be able to focus on the sweet potato casserole recipe I found and taking a Marie Callender pie out of its box.

As one who has a preparedness mindset with the philosophy that it is better to have it and not need it, than to need it and not have it, I ordered a small smoked turkey breast from a gourmet meat company. If anything, I could use it for sandwiches or send it home with my guests in doggie bags.

I woke up early on that memorable Thanksgiving morning eager to start my preparations and cooking. I wanted the house warm and smelling as if I had slaved over my oven since before the sun rose. My guests started to arrive and things started without a hitch. My timing was spot on with juggling my casseroles, potatoes and rolls in my small oven. When Kimnay finally showed up, she carried in a big roasting pan covered in foil that looked like it housed a decent 10 pounder. Knowing nothing about turkeys—it sure appeared that this one would feed an army! To keep it warm, we put it in the bottom rack and I continued finishing the rest of the nosh.

The time finally came to lay out the spread. The turkey—always the star of the show—I had left to present last. After arranging all the steamy sides, I went to the oven for the giant bird Kimnay had so graciously cooked and brought. I gently laid the roasting pan down on its rightful spot in the middle of the dining table and anxiously pulled back the foil, ready to carve the succulent, delicious fowl. The foil, pulled back and removed exposed an empty, rounded ribcage, two legs—in tact—and browned wings.

It did not cross my mind to question how Kimnay had so cleanly removed the meat without breaking the bird’s chest cavity; it didn’t take me put a few seconds to burst out laughing. This was a joke, right? I exclaimed, “Well this is funny!” When I looked over at Kimnay and saw she wasn’t smiling, my good humor was lost in an instant. Where was the breast meat? Was this some new way to carve and serve a turkey?

“Kimnay,” I asked. “Where is the white meat?” Straight-faced, Kimnay replied, “Oh. I left the good parts at home.” She was dead serious.

Kimnay had cooked her turkey, removed the white meat and purposely left it at her house. In the fridge. 50 miles away.

Kimnay had brought me a turkey carcass.

Thankfully, I am a ready-minded person. We all got a slice of turkey breast instead of having to fight over the two legs and wings left of our Thanksgiving turkey.

Now, admittedly, I was devastated, in shock and in mild disbelief at the time. My good humor did not return that afternoon. However, two good things did come of that Thanksgiving. One of those distant relatives who attended and I have become close friends—and no it is not Kimnay—and now I have a hilarious, horribly true story that will never get too old to tell over and over again.

Some may say that Kimnay’s actions were crazy. And they slightly were. Nevertheless, that day was not a full loss. I thoroughly enjoy telling the story now and it makes everyone laugh every time.

I am convinced that every family is a little bit nuts. You can choose to be frustrated, grumpy and argumentative. Or you can choose to embrace their quirkiness. I mean, after all, you are one of them. Love them for their zany antics; embrace the friendly rivalry when they root for the Eagles. Even give them the last piece of white meat.

Robert A. Emmons, Ph.D has studied gratitude for over 10 years. Through scientific research him and his University of California Davis team concludes that being grateful

• Boosts our immune system
• Makes us more resilient to tragedy
• Helps us feel less physical pain
• Lowers our blood pressure
• Gives us more joy
• Creates resistance to stress
• Fosters compassion

I challenge you—before sitting down with the family on Thursday—to take a few minutes and make a mental list of things you are thankful for. Your list doesn’t have to include huge things either for it to improve your mood. It can be as simple as, “I am thankful I woke up this morning,” or “I’m thankful I got a kiss from my dog.”

There are many in the Dallas Fort Worth Metroplex that will be affected by disasters and suffer loss this holiday season. They will struggle with finding reasons to be thankful. To learn how you can help, visit The American Red Cross http://www.redcross.org/support.

*Names have been changed to protect the guilty.

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Family Volunteer Day - November 22nd

by Carol Grinage, volunteer contributor

When we, as adults, see the overall selfishness in society, we worry about today’s children. We wonder how they will learn the spirit of giving to others and caring about others. We wonder what we can do or if there is anything that we can do. Luckily, there is something that we can do to build this trait, and that is volunteering as a family.

Points of Light has designated November 22 as Family Volunteer Day. This is a day in which families volunteer to give back to their community. This day gives parents a chance to show by example the acts of giving and caring. In return, children learn from their parents these traits, and they learn by doing not by lecture. In addition, Family Volunteer Day is a wonderful way for families to bond and create lasting memories by helping others.

So, you are now convinced that Family Volunteer Day would be a pretty cool way to spend quality time as a family. Now, you ask, “What can we do as a family? Will it be difficult? Will it be inconvenient? How do we get started?”

To get started, go to the Points of Light website.

If you are the planning and creative type, there are instructions that guide you as to how to set up your family volunteer project. If you are not so sure about volunteering and you would like some ready-made ideas, you can also find these on the Points of Light website.

There are many different projects that are a good fit for many families. For example, you can volunteer to walk dogs at a shelter or you can create a care package for a troop overseas or you can read to preschool-aged children and give them books. These are just some examples of the many possible family projects.

Once you and your family have completed your project, you will learn what many social scientists have discovered – helping others makes us happy. So…what is your family project this year?

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Dallas Youth Volunteers Take Their Humanitarian Spirit Overseas

by Amy Yen, Digital Communications Manager, American Red Cross North Texas Region

Brothers Hamza and Rayaan Akbar are 16 & 14 years old respectively. But while kids their age usually spend their spare time playing video games, the Akbar boys give their time to the Red Cross.

As youth volunteers at the Dallas chapter, they’ve helped organize blood drives at their school, participated in a call-a-thon to raise funds for disaster relief and helped collect signed holiday cards for service members at Dallas Cowboys Rally Day. But they specifically chose to volunteer for the Red Cross so they could volunteer even when they’re away from home.

“We travel every few months and we wanted to volunteer somewhere where we could continue to volunteer when we travel, like we did this summer. The Red Cross is everywhere,” explained Hamza.

Dallas youth volunteers Hamza and Rayaan Akbar volunteered for the
Indian Red Cross over the summer.

When they visited India over the summer, they took their volunteering overseas and lent their time to the Indian Red Cross. Volunteering for the Dehradun chapter, they helped provide relief to people affected by floods and landslides in the area. They cleared out a warehouse, organized supplies and transported them by bus to make sure they got to the people who needed them. 

“There’s obviously always people willing to help, but they can’t give everyone what they need in a disaster. The Red Cross is always able to get people what they need,” said Hamza. “Some people lost all their kitchenware & some lost blankets & beds & chairs. We got them what they needed.”

Speaking with the Akbar boys about the challenges of working in a relief effort in the unstable political environment of India, it’s easy to forget neither boy is old enough to vote or have a driver’s license.

“We had to make sure everyone got what they needed equally, no matter who they are,” explained Hamza.

Hamza and Rayaan also got to visit three hospitals while they were in India. They spoke with the American Academy of Ophthalmology and got a donation of books to distribute through the Red Cross to residents at the hospitals. 

The Akbar boys present donated ophthalmology books to
residents at an Indian hospital.

“That was my favorite part. I like meeting the residents because they were so happy to get the books. They didn’t have those kinds of books. We thought it was a good idea because many of them want to go to America to study, and this is a good way to get background,” Hamza explained.

Now that the Akbars are back in the States, they want to look at starting a Red Cross Club at their school and possibly organizing a 5K run to benefit the Red Cross.

“I feel good when I get to help someone who needs it,” said Rayaan.

Both boys encouraged other young people to consider volunteering.

“If you want to help others, volunteering is great. You can do a lot of stuff with your time, but if you actually want to help & make your time worth it, you should volunteer at an organization like the Red Cross,” said Hamza. “I get to help people, and I think that’s cool. It makes me feel good. It’s a good use of your time.”

Thank you, Hamza and Rayaan, for your service and for being such inspirational young leaders in our community!

Know a young humanitarian who might want to join the Akbar brothers in volunteering? Learn more about our youth volunteering opportunities.

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